High fructose corn syrup!
I never asked for it. Did you? But noooo! It was just foisted on us during the Reagan-atric 80's when the only moral compass that corporate America and all the yuppie-larva I went to school with was "What're they gonna do?" I doubt that most of the morons at my next-door convenience store who spend 80% of their gross income on lottery tickets and King Cobra Malt Liquor are going to notice the difference, but it should be pointed out to them that besides water,
fructose is a major component in
human seminal fluid (!)
Tasting the new Throwback soda (or POP if you're from western Pennsylvania, Canada or Ohio) next to the stuff we've all been used to is like trying a $50 bottle of wine next to an $8 bottle of grocery store juice. Then again, it almost tastes like something long lost and forbidden. The new Mountain Dew Throwback should go good with absinthe. Gee maybe there's a cocktail there. Hmmmmmm....
If only they'd bring back the old bottles.
